She’s not my cup of tea, she’s more like my shot of whiskey.and even though weve never met sometimes I wonder if she’s missed me. If I’ve ever gone through her mind while she plays between her thighs, closes her eyes and realises how hard life apart is. Maybe she wants me. Maybe I want her more every time I walk through the door I just want her a little more. And more. And more….
Fuck i look like resorting to this? compulsively pressing buttons,appearing on a monitor. I think im losing it.
Ive been drinking and thinking and that never amounts to anything.Nothing.
I know ill be fine in the morning but right now im not.Im never ok, really.Really?
Fuck are you smoking mah nigga? There goes my insecurities building walls to defend itself.
Maybe i should lose it. Lose it all.Again.
Cuz you like it dont you? You like losing it. You smile when you cry,you’re sick like that.
You are a clown, A sad lonely clown.
What it look like though? My emotional baggage look light, but its heavy though.
Just to let you know, i probably do love you. but ill never figure that out.
just do me like my emotion i know what ill be doing tomorrow
But right now, Right now i just dont want to be okay if thats okay with you.
OH LORD I WISH I BELIEVED IN YOU.
What it look like? From your perspective? To see me slowly and progressively lose my mind?Progression.thats a funny word.
Im progressively losing my mind.
It’s nice being able to share. The way you described what u go through was so familiar. I’ve struggled a lot with schizophrenia and only now am I learning to deal with it. It is nice knowing I’m not alone in this.
Skeletons in my downtown 6 train.-Bronx, N.Y